How to Kill Time in an Outlet Mall

My grandmother, Mimi, and I went shopping at the outlet mall today. She is sort of a marathon shopper, so I just wrote off the entire day. Today is the day we shop. Once we parked the car she said, ‘I just need to pick up a pair of shoes at Brooks Brothers, and get a pair of socks for your grandfather.’ This is her classic misdirect. What she really meant is, lets pick up a pair of shoes at Brooks Brothers, get a pair of socks for your grandfather, and then spend four hours looking at things we don’t need. I’ve learned to just go along for the ride. We had parked in front of the Ralph Lauren outlet, which is where we needed to go to get Papa’s special socks. But before we went in to get socks, we went to Lucky Jeans. I mean, It was RIGHT THERE. We clearly had to. Twenty minutes later we left with two pairs of jeans and headed to Ralph Lauren for real. Papa needed this one particular kind of socks. No substitutions! Unfortunately, they didn’t have them. While they were checking in the back for Papa’s special socks, my aunt called. The rest of the time in Ralph Lauren was spent on the phone with my aunt. She wanted something but she wasn’t really sure what. This lead to one of the strangest wild goose chases I have ever been on. I love a good wild goose chase. We would walk around until we saw something she might like, and then Mimi would describe it to her in great detail. She even got an employee to help. That had to have been one of the strangest requests he got all day. At least he got to leave before we had to describe the scent of a perfume. We took a short break from the merchandise describing game when Mimi passed the phone to me so my aunt could tell me everything I needed to properly ride a horse and why (she can’t seriously think I care. I NEVER care) In the end we came out sock-less but with two v-neck shirts. Victorious?

The general plan was to wander around hopping from store to store until we made our way to Brooks Brothers, which was all the way at the other end of the street/mall/oh, you know what I mean. Outdoor malls confuse me. There were some great sales (30 – 60% off in most cases) so while doing this, I bought two belts, one dress, and a scarf.

As I predicted, it was almost dinner time by the time I got home. 


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